Let me kick off this post with some bittersweet, point blank truths. I believe Satan attacks us most by digging his nails into our hearts, planting lies and spreading them throughout our realities until we become blinded from truth. Satan uses social media as a top choice catalyst attack weapon. As far as lies go, social media is the perfect platform. Veiled from true reality, we only observe the happy-go-lucky versions of those we are “friends” with. Catching a glimpse of happy moments, or people filled photos, or loving families, or whatever it maybe. What we don’t see in those pictures is the loneliness that sneaks up on all of us, the frustration of failed relationships, the lack of fulfilling work. Maybe I am the only one, but to honest with you, I’m the number one candidate for falling prey to these sort of Satan thresholds. I scour cute Mormon mom blogs or friends people filled photos and immediately become dissatisfied with my life. The reason I am starting our honeymoon blog with this type of blunt posting is I do not to pose a stumbling block to anyone else by continuing to feed into this type of sin. Bopants and I are not perfect. We did not deserve to find one another so young or travel the world together. Heck, we did not deserve for the perfect Savior of the world to hang himself on a cross for our wicked sins. We are humbly blessed to be sharing these experiences together and with those we love.
In the weeks and months leading up to our wedding, Bopants and I had hands down some of the hardest, most frustratingly tough times of our entire lives. There were multiple moments were we came up for air completely drained and wondering what on earth God was doing because none of it was “fair” or “made sense”. Whatever those even mean. May marked the one-year anniversary of one of our beloved friends, William Christopher Brogan, being victim in a motor accident that has taken a toll on him physically, spiritually and emotionally. The road to recovery is going to be much longer, enduring and testing. But if Chris is anything, he’s a focused fighter for the things he loves and believes in. Surrounded by faith and family, he will overcome each trial with pizaz and style. The Lord was amazing in allowing this best friend of ours to not only be present for the wedding but up on stage with us. Yet, even after one year this tragedy is still tough to comprehend. A major physical therapy moment, Chris was able to stand with help of two brothers during the ceremony. I will forever treasure this moment as one of my wedding favorites.
Another one of dear friends, Jordan Blake Watts, has been a major monument in our love story. After playing John Mayer’s “In Your Atmosphere” (which I only heard him play technically right that one time, lil goof) at a small coffeehouse show, he dedicated it to myself after Bopants and I officially started dating. Jordan played beautiful tunes at our proposal and orchestrated some of my favorite College Station memories that weekend. We were beyond stoked to have him scheduled to serenade our wedding reception. After Jordan’s death, a mere week before the wedding, I would get physically sick talking about the wedding in general – specifically the reception. We clung unto our close friendships and I virtually dropped off the wedding planning map. A week before one of the biggest days in our lives, we had lost complete joy, stopped returning wedding phone calls and somewhat emotionally shut off into survival mode. Our families stepped up in amazing ways, taking over responsibilities and making the decisions we couldn’t bear to think of. Jordan’s family paved the path of genuine Christ centered love and forgiveness and I truly believe that it was by their example alone that we allowed Christ to tend to our wounds and progress through toward the wedding. One of our goofiest friends, Austin Wideman was able to make it to the wedding after flying home from a mission trip for Jordan’s funeral service. Wideman introduced Bopants and I summer of 2010, after being each of our best friends individually in the spring prior. He is a stud of a man. We owe this dude not only our relationship, but also truckloads of gratitude for his spiritual challenges, relentless pursuit and ability to point to the cross in all circumstances. Walking through such heartache and joy in such a condensed timeframe with him was irreplaceable. Friggen hard. Not fun. But perfect because we can’t imagine going through that with anyone else.
The reason I am sharing these heart intimacies is because I want you to know what went down behind the scenes. Before the white dress & moon river. Before the Disney bounce house & nacho bar. Before the bachelorette onesies & pink sprinkle donuts. Our lives are nothing near perfect. We are some messed up and broken people who are bound together only by our loving Lord. I realize this post is a bit of a tease, since I haven’t actually talked about our honeymoon in Europe. Not to fear, within the next day or so you will be updated with trip photos and witty antidotes. Till then, au revoir.